14 years ago today I met a man at a Carl’s Jr. drive-thru window in Sun Valley, California. That summer I had felt directionless. Though I had a few years sober and was excelling in some ways, I was restless in others. Where was my life going? What was I going to do? I began to think that maybe a relapse would be a good idea. After all, then I could sabotage all the good work I had done and start over–avoiding the fear of “what next.” And so I drove at 3am to a fast food restaurant because I wanted a snack, and my life was forever changed. I met a man, seemingly homeless, at that window outside of Carl’s. He asked if I wanted to get high. I said, “No man, I don’t do that anymore.” He said, “This shit is killing me.” Time stopped. He looked at me with his tears in his eyes saying, “I used to be somebody you know.” We rapped for awhile until I had to pull away. I said, “Just don’t give up man, don’t give up.” We shook hands, I drove away.
I cried all the way home. What a world we live in. The pain. The suffering. The joy. The wonder. All of it. All of a sudden THE CALL was placed on my heart and I heard “You are going to speak and write and it will help people. It will serve them. You’ve almost died 100 times over, and still here you are.” I was filled with joy! It was like I was bouncing up and down saying to God, “Me! Pick me!”
And so here I am, 14 years later. I have been relentless in my pursuit of God. I have been relentless in my inner work, that I may be a healthy vessel, a positive vehicle for change and transformation. I have been dedicated and passionate about THE CALL, for it is my life and is my love. Admittedly, I am not the most well rounded person. I do not have hobbies (don’t care), have not married or had children (hasn’t been my priority), do not attend meet ups or probably even have the social circle I could or should. What I do have is a BIG VISION of what I know, and that is The Revolution of Love. It is a ministry that matters. It has value and is important. Especially in times such as these. I have A CALL that was placed on my heart and I am here to share it. With You. Thank you for all my birthday wishes and the love you shared. Now let’s do this thing. We can make it happen.